The Language of Love

One of the most encouraging pastoral letters I have seen for some time was published on March 24^th, the eve of the feast of the Annunciation, by Bishop James Conley of Lincoln Nebraska. The pastoral letter entitled the ‘Language of Love’ highlights the sacrificial nature of authentic love and the disruptive immorality of contraception.

Bishop Conley referred to the visit of Mother Teresa of Calcutta twenty years ago and reminded his congregation about some of the things she said;

“Love,” she told them, “has to hurt. I must be willing to give whatever it takes not to harm other people and, in fact, to do good to them.  This requires that I be willing to give until it hurts.  Otherwise, there is no true love in me and I bring injustice, not peace, to those around me.”

Mother Teresa he says, ‘believed, as do I, that much of the world’s unhappiness and injustice begins with a disregard for the miracle of life created in the womb of mothers.  Today, our culture rejects love when it rejects the gift of new life, through the use of contraception’

Mother Teresa he continues said that, “in destroying the power of giving life, through contraception, a husband or wife…destroys the gift of love.”

Husbands and wives are made to freely offer themselves as gifts to one another in friendship, and to share in the life-giving love of God.

He created marriage to be unifying and procreative.  To join husband and wife inseparably in the mission of love, and to bring forth from that love something new. 

The full text of letter is included below and can also be read in full on thislink.

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ

Twenty years ago, Blessed Mother Teresa of Calcutta stood before the President of the United States, before senators and congressmen, before justices of the United States Supreme Court.  She spoke about her work among the world’s poor.  She spoke about justice and compassion.  Most importantly, she spoke about love.

“Love,” she told them, “has to hurt. I must be willing to give whatever it takes not to harm other people and, in fact, to do good to them.  This requires that I be willing to give until it hurts.  Otherwise, there is no true love in me and I bring injustice, not peace, to those around me.”[1]

Sacrifice is the language of love.  Love is spoken in the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, who poured out his life for us on the cross. Love is spoken in the sacrifice of the Christian life, sharing in Christ’s life, death, and resurrection.  And love is spoken in the sacrifice of parents, and pastors, and friends.

We live in a world short on love.  Today, love is too often understood as romantic sentimentality rather than unbreakable commitment. But sentimentality is unsatisfying.  Material things, and comfort, and pleasure bring only fleeting happiness.  The truth is that we are all searching for real love, because we are all searching for meaning.

Love—real love—is about sacrifice, and redemption, and hope.  Real love is at the heart of a rich, full life.  We are made for real love.  And all that we do—in our lives, our careers, and our families, especially—should be rooted in our capacity for real, difficult, unfailing love.

But today, in a world short on love, we’re left without peace, and without joy.

In my priesthood, I have stood in front of abortion clinics to offer help to women experiencing unwanted pregnancies; I have prayed with the neglected elderly; and I have buried young victims of violence.  I have seen the isolation, the injustice, and the sadness that comes from a world short on love.  Mother Teresa believed, as do I, that much of the world’s unhappiness and injustice begins with a disregard for the miracle of life created in the womb of mothers.  Today, our culture rejects love when it rejects the gift of new life, through the use of contraception

Mother Teresa said that, “in destroying the power of giving life, through contraception, a husband or wife…destroys the gift of love.”

Husbands and wives are made to freely offer themselves as gifts to one another in friendship, and to share in the life-giving love of God.

He created marriage to be unifying and procreative.  To join husband and wife inseparably in the mission of love, and to bring forth from that love something new.

Contraception robs the freedom for those possibilities.

God made us to love and to be loved.  He made us to delight in the power of sexual love to bring forth new human beings, children of God, created with immortal souls.  Our Church has always taught that rejecting the gift of children erodes the love between husband and wife: it distorts the unitive and procreative nature of marriage.  The use of contraception gravely and seriously disrupts the sacrificial, holy, and loving meaning of marriage itself.

The Church continues to call Catholic couples to unity and procreativity. Marriage is a call to greatness—to loving as God loves—freely, creatively, and generously.  God himself is a community of love—the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  Christian marriage is an invitation to imitate, and to know, and to share in the joyful freedom of God’s love, an echo of the Holy Trinity.

 _________

In 1991, my predecessor, Bishop Glennon P. Flavin, wrote that “there can be no true happiness in your lives unless God is very much a part of your marriage covenant.  To expect to find happiness in sin is to look for good in evil…. To keep God in your married life, to trust in his wisdom and love, and to obey his laws…will deepen your love for each other and will bring to you that inner peace of mind and heart which is the reward of a good conscience.”[2]

God is present in every marriage, and present during every marital embrace.  He created sexuality so that males and females could mirror the Trinity: forming, in their sexual union, the life-long bonds of family.  God chose to make spouses cooperators with him in creating new human lives, destined for eternity.  Those who use contraception diminish their power to unite and they give up the opportunity to cooperate with God in the creation of life.

As Bishop of Lincoln, I repeat the words of Bishop Flavin.  Dear married men and women: I exhort you to reject the use of contraception in your marriage.  I challenge you to be open to God’s loving plan for your life.  I invite you to share in the gift of God’s life-giving love.  I fervently believe that in God’s plan, you will rediscover real love for your spouse, your children, for God, and for the Church.  I know that in this openness to life, you will find the rich adventure for which you were made.

Our culture often teaches us that children are more a burden than a gift—that families impede our freedom and diminish our finances.  We live in a world where large families are the objects of spectacle and derision, instead of the ordinary consequence of a loving marriage entrusted to God’s providence.  But children should not be feared as a threat or a burden, but rather seen as a sign of hope for the future.

In 1995, Blessed John Paul II wrote that our culture suffers from a “hedonistic mentality unwilling to accept responsibility in matters of sexuality, and… a self-centered concept of freedom, which regards procreation as an obstacle to personal fulfilment. ”[3]  Generous, life-giving spousal love is the antitode to hedonism and immaturity: parents gladly give up frivolous pursuits and selfishness for the intensely more meaningful work of loving and educating their children.

In the Diocese of Lincoln, I am grateful for the example of hundreds of families who have opened themselves freely and generously to children.  Some have been given large families, and some have not.  And of course, a few suffer the very difficult, hidden cross of infertility or low fertility.  The mystery of God’s plan for our lives is incomprehensible.  But the joy of these families, whether or not they bear many children, disproves the claims of the contraceptive mentality.

Dear brothers and sisters, Blessed John Paul II reminded us that, “man is called to a fullness of life which far exceeds the dimensions of his earthly existence, because it consists in sharing the very life of God.”[4] The sexual intimacy of marriage, the most intimate kind of human friendship, is a pathway to sharing in God’s own life.  It is a pathway to the fullness of our own human life; it is a means of participating in the incredible love of God.  Contraception impedes our share in God’s creative love.  And thus it impedes our joy.

The joy of families living in accord with God’s plan animates and enriches our community with a spirit of vitality and enthusiasm.  The example of your friends and neighbors demonstrates that while children require sacrifice, they are also the source of joy, meaning, and of peace.  Who does not understand the great gift of a loving family?

Yes, being lovingly open to children requires sacrifice. But sacrifice is the harbinger of true joy.  Dear brothers and sisters, I invite you to be open to joy.

_________

Of course, there are some true and legitimate reasons why, at certain times, families may discern being called to the sacrifice of delaying children. For families with serious mental, physical, or emotional health problems, or who are experiencing dire financial troubles, bearing children might best be delayed.  The Catechism of the Catholic Church teaches that couples must have “just” reasons to delay childbearing. For couples facing difficulties of various kinds, the Church recommends Natural Family Planning: a method for making choices about engaging in fruitful sexual relations.

Natural Family Planning does not destroy the power to give life: instead, it challenges couples to discern prayerfully when to engage in life-giving sexual acts. It is an integrated, organic and holistic approach to fertility care.

Natural Family Planning is a reliable and trustworthy way to regulate fertility, is easy to learn, and can be a source of unity for couples.  To be sure, using NFP requires sacrifice and patience, but sacrifice and patience are not obstacles to love, they are a part of love itself.  Used correctly, NFP forms gentle, generous husbands, and selfless, patient wives.  It can become a school of virtuous and holy love.

Those who confine sexual intimacy to the infertile times of the month are not engaging in contraceptive practices.  They do not attempt to make a potentially fertile act infertile.  They sacrificially abstain during the fertile time precisely because they respect fertility; they do not want to violate it; they do not want to treat the gift of fertility as a burden.

In some relatively rare instances, Natural Family Planning is used by couples with a contraceptive mentality.  Too often couples can choose to abstain from fertility by default, or out of fear of the consequences of new life.  I encourage all couples who use Natural Family Planning to be very open with each other concerning the reasons they think it right to limit their family size, to take their thoughts to God, and to pray for his guidance. Do we let fear, anxiety, or worry determine the size of our families? Do we entrust ourselves to the Lord, whose generosity provides for all of our needs?

“Perfect love,” scripture teaches, “casts out fear.”[5]

Dear friends, I exhort you to openness in married life.  I exhort you to trust in God’s abundant providence.

_________

I would like to address in a special way Catholic physicians, pharmacists and other healthcare professionals.  The noble aim of your profession is to aid men and women as they live according to God’s perfect plan. Bishop Flavin wrote that, as professionals, “you are in a position to be God’s instruments in manifesting his truth, and his love.”[6]

No Catholic healthcare provider, in good conscience, should engage in the practice of medicine by undermining the gift of fertility.  There is no legitimate medical reason to aid in the acts of contraception or sterilization.  No Catholic physician can honestly argue otherwise.

Healthcare is the art of healing.  Contraception and sterilization may never be considered healthcare.  Contraception and sterilization denigrate and degrade the body’s very purpose.  Fertility is an ordinary function of health and human flourishing; and an extraordinary participation in God’s creative love.  Contraception and sterilization stifle the natural and the supernatural processes of marriage, and cause grave harm.  They treat fertility as though it were a terrible inconvenience, or even a physical defect that needs to be treated.

Contraception attempts to prevent life from the beginning, and when that fails, some contraception destroys newly created life.  Many contraceptives work by preventing the implantation of an embryonic human being in the uterus of his or her mother.

Contraception is generally regarded by the medical community as the ordinary standard of care for women. The Church’s teachings are often regarded as being opposed to the health and well-being of women.  But apart from the moral and spiritual dangers of contraception, there are also grave physical risks to the use of most chemical contraceptives.  Current medical literature overwhelmingly confirms that contraception puts women at risk for serious health problems, which doctors should consider very carefully.

Some women have health conditions that are better endured when treated by hormonal contraceptives.  But the effects of contraception often mask the underlying conditions that endanger women’s health.  Today, there are safe, natural means of correcting hormonal imbalances, and solving the conditions that are often treated by contraception.

Contraception is an unhealthy standard of care.  All doctors can do better.

Catholic physicians are called to help their patients and their colleagues learn the truth about the dangers of contraception and sterilization.  The good example of a physician who refuses to prescribe contraceptives and perform sterilizations or a pharmacist who refuses to distribute contraceptives in spite of antagonism, financial loss, or professional pressure is an opportunity to participate in the suffering of Jesus Christ.  I am grateful for the Catholic physicians and pharmacists who evangelize their patients and colleagues through a commitment to the truth.

 ________

Tragically, a majority of people in our culture and even in our Church, have used contraception.  Much of the responsibility for that lies in the fact that too few have ever been exposed to clear and consistent teaching on the subject.  But the natural consequences of our culture’s contraceptive mentality are clear.  Mother Teresa reflected that “once living love is destroyed by contraception, abortion follows very easily.”[7]  She was right.  Cultural attitudes that reject the gift of life lead very easily to social acceptance for abortion, for no-fault divorce, and for fatherless families.  For fifty years, America has accepted the use of contraception, and the consequences have been dire.

Dear brothers and sisters, I encourage you to read the encyclical by Pope Paul VI, Humanae Vitae with your spouse, or in your parish.  Consider also Married Love and the Gift of Life, written by the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops.

Dear brother priests, I encourage you to preach about the dangers of contraception, and to visit with families in your parish about this issue.

Dear brothers and sisters, if you have used or prescribed contraception, the merciful love of God awaits.  Healing is possible—in the sacrament of penance.  If you have used or supported contraception, I pray that you will stop, and that you will avail yourself of God’s tender mercy by making a good heartfelt confession.

_________

Today, openness to children is rarely celebrated, rarely understood, and rarely supported.  To many, the Church’s teachings on life seem oppressive or old-fashioned.  Many believe that the Church asks too great a sacrifice.

But sacrifice is the language of love.  And in sacrifice, we speak the language of God himself.  I am calling you, dear brothers and sisters, to encounter Christ in your love for one another.  I am calling you to rich and abundant family life.  I am calling you to rejoice in the love, and the sacrifice, for which you were made.  I am calling your family to share in the creative, active love of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

I pray that in true sacrifice, each of you will know perfect joy.

Through the intercession of Our Lady of the Annunciation, the Holy Family, and in the love of Jesus Christ,

+James D. Conley

Bishop of Lincoln

March 25, 2014

Solemnity of the Annunciation of the Lord

[1] Blessed Teresa of Calcutta.  National Prayer Breakfast, 1994.

[2] Glennon P. Flavin, Pastoral Letter to Catholic Couples and Physicians.  September 26, 1991

[3] Blessed John Paul II.  Evangelium Vitae, 13.

[4] Ibid. 2.

[5] I John 4:18

[6] Bishop Flavin.

[7] Blessed Teresa of Calcutta.  National Prayer Breakfast, 1994.

Humanae Vitae

Pope Paul VI’s great Encyclical Humanae Vitae [1968] caused much controversy both when it was first published, and ever since that time, for the simple reason that it did not say what many people wanted it to say – that is, it confirmed Catholic teaching that the practise contraception is sinful.

Pope Paul was criticised by the world’s media as well as by many of his own bishops and by ordinary lay Catholics, for his faithful adherence to Catholic teaching on the sacredness of all human life. During his General Audience on the Wednesday following publication of the Encyclical, the Pope spoke of his ‘grave responsibility’ to teach the truth. On his decision to do so, he said:

‘The first conviction was that of a grave responsibility. It led Us into, and sustained Us in, the very heart of the problem during the four years devoted to the study of this Encyclical. We confide to you that this conviction caused Us much spiritual suffering. Never before have We felt so heavily as in this situation the burden of Our office. We studied, read, and discussed, as much as we could, and We also prayed very much about it … Imploring the light of the Holy Spirit, we placed Our conscience at the free and full disposal of the voice of Truth. We sought to interpret the divine law that flows from the very nature of human love, from the essential structure of married life, from the personal dignity of husband and wife, from their mission of service to life as well as from the sanctity of Christian marriage. We reflected on the firm principles of the traditional doctrine in force in the Church, and especially on the recent Council. We pondered on the consequences of one or other decision, and We had no doubt about Our duty to give Our decision in terms expressed in the Encyclical.’

'Supreme Court judgement devalues every human life'

The recent Irish Supreme Court Judgement on the fate of the three frozen embryos has initiated a national dialogue on the issues surrounding in vitro fertilization (IVF). There have been calls for new legislation in the area and the enactment of such legislation has been promised by Health Minister Mary Harney.

In the context of the ongoing debate a colleague Séamas de Barra, has sent me a commentary on an article by Fr. Kevin Doran that appeared in the January edition of the 'Alive newspaper.

In his article of January 2010, 'Supreme Court judgement devalues every human life' [p. 4], Fr Kevin Doran says among other things:

The problem of the Roche embryos arose because, in the absence of legislation, clinics and hospitals in Ireland have begun to keep embryos in frozen storage.
Legislation is required to ensure that clinics which perform IVF only generate the number of embryos which can be safely transferred to the mother's womb in one treatment cycle.
Better still, research funding should be diverted to programmes which seek to prevent or to treat infertility, rather than simply trying to get around it.

In his commentary Mr de Barra sets out the following:

As regards the third paragraph we know that good work is being done by the likes of Dr Phil Boyle with his NaProTechnology/FertilityCare, and also by the staff of the National Association of the Ovulation Method of Ireland [NAOMI] who help those who are having difficulty having a child.

I disagree with Fr Doran that Mrs Roche's problem arises because of lack of legislation here in Ireland. The problem arises because of the practice of In Vitro Fertilization itself in Ireland. In its Instruction Donum Vitae (1987) the Vatican condemned the practice of IVF, and other unethical means of getting around infertility. The Vatican repeated the condemnation in the Instruction Dignitas Personae which is dated, September 8, 2008.

The first solution that Fr Doran recommends actually is condemned in par. 15 of Dignitas Personae:

The reason for multiple transfer is to increase the probability that at least one embryo will implant in the uterus. In this technique, therefore, the number of embryos transferred is greater than the single child desired, in the expectation that some embryos will be lost and multiple pregnancy may not occur. In this way, the practice of multiple embryo transfer implies a purely utilitarian treatment of embryos. One is struck by the fact that, in any other area of medicine, ordinary professional ethics and the healthcare authorities themselves would never allow a medical procedure which involved such a high number of failures and fatalities. In fact, techniques of in vitro fertilization are accepted based on the presupposition that the individual embryo is not deserving of full respect in the presence of the competing desire for offspring which must be satisfied.

Let us put things in context. Of 100 embryos conceived in vitro [i.e. 'on glass', in a petri dish] and frozen, only 40 survive the thawing process. Only 10% of those 40, that is 4, have any chance of being born, and that is putting it at its most optimistic. That is, the optimum success rate is 4 out of 100. The so-called "take-home baby rate" is enhanced only because of the use of multiple-embryo transfer.

In par. 16 Dignitas Personae refers to the 'blithe acceptance of the enormous number of abortions involved in the process of in vitro fertilization'. Nevertheless in par. 19 we are reminded by means of a quotation from Pope John Paul II that 'there seems to be no morally licit solution regarding the human destiny of the thousands and thousands of "frozen" embryos which are and remain the subjects of essential rights and should therefore be protected by law as human persons.' In other words, it is actually immoral to transfer these frozen embryos, whether by single-embryo transfer, or by multiple-embryo transfer, to their mother's womb. In par. 23 of Dignitas Personae we are reminded of the 'serious penalties in canon law' that those involved in abortion attract. The reference is to automatic excommunication, for being involved in, or voting for, the like.

The problem with IVF is not dissimilar to that of Humanae Vitae. The Church's authentic teachings on these matters are regarded by many priests and bishops as a dead letter, and instead, they give the laity their own private opinions on them.

It is vital that all voices should be heard on the issues at stake here and which have major implications for the right to life of the human embryo prior to implantation in the womb of a woman. Future legislation will without doubt have significant implications for the constitutional protection of the unborn in Ireland

The 1960s are Ancient History

The editorial of the current issue of FAITH magazine responds to the results of a survey published in The Tablet, which claimed to prove definitively that Catholics reject Humanae Vitae.

As the editorial points out, The Tablet's treatment of a deliberately misleading and agenda-driven survey is symptomatic of the paper's narrow-minded, outdated editorial stance. Fr David Barrett writes:

The assumptions made by The Tablet throughout its issue for the fortieth anniversary of Humanae Vitae (26th July 2008) throw a light upon its editorial stance. They are pre-judged, never fully articulated or worked out, and they significantly damage even the magazine’s interpretation of the survey of Catholic attitudes and actions which they published in that issue.

The Faith article draws attention to particular details, such as the patronising generalisation that 'thinking Catholics' expected the Church to embrace contraception (unlike non-sentient individuals such as Paul the VI and Karol Wojtila) and the apparent belief that the entirety of the Catholic Church's teaching on sexuality are contained within one encyclical.

The terrifying thing is that The Tablet is still taken seriously within the secular press as a Catholic mouthpiece when it has not been Catholic in any meaningful sense of the word for decades and appears - like a middle-aged parent in denial - to be entirely out of touch with the movements that have grown up within the Church over the past thirty years. A generation of young Catholics is emerging through movements such as FAITH and Youth 2000 who are orthodox, faithful, educated... and increasingly impatient with an intransigent establishment locked in the sixties. As one Catholic pro-life activist put it:

"The liberal establishment don't seem to realise that for people our age [twenties] the 1960s are ancient history. I for one am unimpressed by patronising lectures about how awful it used to be and how grateful I should be to the architects of the permissive society, when we are the generation who are being forced to deal with the consequences. It is rather like trying to clean up the mess after someone else's orgy and being commanded to be absolutely delighted about it. It just adds insult to injury."

Celebrating Humanae Vitae

In preparation for the 40th anniversary of the publication of Humanae Vitae, Human Life International, Fr Tom Euteneuer has launched a website offering resources to priests including research on Humanae Vitae and related issues and notes for preaching on the encyclical.

Forty years ago, the pulpits of the world fell silent on the subject of human sexuality. Let there be a few voices in the wilderness speaking out loud and clear, this weekend and beyond.

Notes on Humanae Vitae from the JPII Generation

I came across a talk recently, entitled A Catholic Vision of Love and Sex given at the Catholic Chaplaincy of St Andrew's University in Scotland by a member of the JPII Generation(i.e. born and grew up during John Paul II's pontificate). This generation of young people were strongly influenced by the late pope's clarity of vision and have embraced the Church's teachings, largely to the surprise and disguiet of the older generation. Having grown up in the brutal moral turmoil predicted by Humanae Vitae, the JPII Generation is now defending this prophetic encyclical in the public sphere with enthusiasm, making use of the new media to get the message across. Facebook, the social networking website so popular with young people, currently contains no fewer than 19 groups about Humanae Vitae, none of them negative.

One has to be realistic about the numbers of young people who disregard the Church's teaching but, 40 years on, it is possible for a generation who were born long after the encyclical was published, to consider the message of Humanae Vitae without the hang-ups and prejudices their parents may have had.

Humanae Vitae 40 Years On

The landmark Papal encyclical Humanae Vitae (On Human Life) which was published by Pope Paul VI, 40 years ago this week has claims to being the most controversial encyclical of modern times.

The encyclical which reaffirmed the Church’s constant teaching on the regulation of births is perhaps the most misunderstood papal
encyclical. It simply teaches the truth about human sexuality, a truth which was (and still is) unpaletable, a truth that became the spark which led to decades of doubt and dissent among many Catholics, plunging us into what Pope John Paul II so aptly called the “culture of Death.” Denounced by critics inside and outside the Church, Humanae Vitae has nevertheless proved to be chillingly prophetic in its warnings. Forty years later this encyclical is more relevant than ever

The Encyclical warned of four trends which would occur if the use of artificial contraception became widespread. First it claimed there would be a general lowering of moral standards throughout society. The second claim was that there would be a rise in infidelity. The third claim was that there would be a lessening of respect for women by men, and finally that it would lead to the coercive use of reproductive technologies by governments. Any truthful analysis of modern society will clearly show that all of these predictions have come to pass, each with its own drastic consequences, the moral destruction of society Paul VI warned about in his encyclical can be seen all around us.

A new website set up to commemorate the 40th anniversary of Humamae Vitae contains a wealth of information on the issues and is well worth a visit

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